my health teacher asked for different ways to prevent pregnancy and i said “do it in the butt” and i got extra credit because no one has ever said that before
(via mesoreilles)
when you’re typing “good morning” and you accidentally type “hood morning”
(via beingtooweird)
Leonardo DiCaprio tried to make fun of his character with the line “I will just wait here”, when in fact that line wasn’t originally scripted. Everyone started laughing and James Cameron said that the line was “Too funny” to ignore it.
Not funny enough for an oscar.
You’re going to hell for that
(via theuntoldstoryofmylife)
if i had the power to control time i would probably just use it to sleep more
or catch up on tv series
(via theuntoldstoryofmylife)
This guy at my school shows up every day with like a fake wolf tail clipped to his back belt loop, and I always see him running from class to class and jumping over things and he looks so happy to exist and sometimes he brings a lil wolf puppet with him and he makes it run along next to him on the strings
I’m just like u go wolf kid live ur dreams
(via theuntoldstoryofmylife)
at what age do i just magically turn hot
(Source: vanitytides, via beingtooweird)
How the FUCK am I supposed to have a good day when 28% of Americans aren’t getting enough fiber?
(via theuntoldstoryofmylife)
“According to Greek mythology, humans were originally created with four arms, four legs, and a head with two faces. Fearing their power, Zeus split them into two separate beings condemning them to spend their lives in search for their other halves.”
~Plato’s The Symposium.
This is just legitimately sad.
and this is why i’ll never meet my circle.
i’m guessing it’s on another country or even continent
(Source: eternalseptember, via theuntoldstoryofmylife)
the best moment in cinematic history
(Source: jamesfrancoco, via theuntoldstoryofmylife)
(Source: fuglyslot, via theuntoldstoryofmylife)
so i was eating some of those sugary gross conversation hearts. (they were on for $1 at work) and I was reading them.
they say like ‘cool’ and ‘ur cute’ and then suddenly
I think the factory workers need help
(via onceagainsheishis)
